Got a date!

February was a great month!! My sister came out to see me and we had so much fun. It was nice to have some company and show her around the sights. I dragged her to my appointment with the endocrinologist and neurosurgeon as well haha, woooo highlight of her trip I'm sure!! It was good to have an extra set of ears in there though and someone who understands whats happening without me having to explain it to them. It sounded like the neurosurgeon wanted to just go in and take the pituitary gland right away...but I'm still kind of hesitant about that. Apparently he has a reputation for being aggressive but getting the job done. We agreed that he would go in and explore first and take out something if he found it...there's still a risk of losing pituitary function but at least there's a chance of saving it. He said if he doesn't see anything then he will take the gland out during the same surgery though so that I don't have to go through another surgery. I will have to have a second if they remove a lesion and my body still isn't cured but it will be a couple days after the first surgery so at least it will all be one hospital stay. If neither of these works then I will have to have radiation therapy probably b/c its likely the wall of the cavity the pituitary gland is housed in. I really hope it doesn't come to that!! I'm determined that this hospital visit will be successful!! This whole journey has been a huge learning experience and I have grown a lot...but quite frankly I think I've learned enough and I'm over it! Ready to move on thank you!! I have a whole new sympathy for people who are overweight and really admire people who have lost weight. My goal is to lose 80 pounds and it scares the crap out of me! That is like an entire person. Well a child anyway haha. I know I can do it though once all of this extra cortisol is gone. 

So yes! I got the surgery date. This time next week the surgery will be over and I will be sleeping in my hospital bed dreaming of my newly cured self :) Wednesday March 14th. I'm trying to be positive but I'm really not looking forward to it 100%. I can't wait for it to be done but at the same time I really don't enjoy the whole surgery experience. My mom is flying out this Sunday so we will have a couple of days of fun before heading back to Foothills. Poor mom, it'll be her birthday while she is here...March 18 so I'll likely still be in the hospital - do I know how to celebrate or what? haha! She said that the best gift of all will be a successful surgery so here's to hoping she gets her wish. I can't wait for this to be done so my parents don't have to worry anymore. I feel guilty hogging my mom though b/c Dad is going for his hernia surgery on the 20th...she wasn't going with him anyway but still I'm sure he would have liked her company leading up to it. I didn't really feel like I could ask my doctors to reschedule though haha, we've been waiting awhile to fix this. 

A few people have been asking me lately, including a dr, if I've been seeing a mental health professional to talk about my whole experience and what I'm dealing with. I never really thought about it to be honest but I can see how it could be helpful to someone. I honestly don't know what I would talk to them about really which is why I haven't gone. I am lucky enough to have a great support system of family and friends who I have definitely confided, vented, cried and laughed with throughout this. Perhaps I have relied on them too much and should have gone to someone trained to listen but I appreciate everyone who has been there. Knowing that people care and are thinking of me means SO much and has given me the love and strength to cope so thank you! <3 It has reminded me how much a smile and hello means and I will try to remember to pass it on to others.